Hey friend,
Can we talk about perceptions for a minute? It might just change the way you see yourself and others—the roles we play in each other’s stories.
You know, I’ve been thinking lately about how we’re all stars in our own lives but supporting characters in everyone else’s.
And here’s the mind-blowing part: most of the time, it’s not even about us.
Think about this.
In some people’s stories, you’re the hero – the one who always shows up, who’s got it all together.
In others, you might be the villain – too busy, too successful, too… something.
But here’s the real truth: none of these roles show who you really are. And more importantly, they’re not even about you at all.
- When someone sees your success as intimidating, it’s about their own insecurities.
- When they call your enthusiasm too much, it’s about their own comfort zone.
- When they label your emotions as weakness, it’s about their own struggles with vulnerability.
It’s all filtered through their own experiences, fears, and yes, even their own baggage.
WOWZERS, that’s a new way to think about it, isn’t it? To realize that their perception of you is more about them than it is about you?
But here’s where it gets tricky. We often filter how we show up, trying to manage these perceptions. We play small or overcompensate. We try to be everything to everyone.
Exhausting, right? (it makes me tired just thinking about it)
Try this: focus on the only perception that truly matters – your own. Your opinion of yourself, who you are, and how you show up that’s what matters.
Pick one of these steps to start shifting your focus:
- Mirror Magic: Look yourself in the eye and say three truths about who you are – not what you do, but who you are at your core.
- Perception Shift: Next time you feel judged or misunderstood, pause and ask, “What might be going on in their world to make them see things this way?” Remember, it’s rarely about you.
- Value Check: Write down your top three values. Do one small thing today that aligns with each of these values – regardless of what anyone else might think. (this one is my fav; I use it most in my coaching practice)
Remember, you have no control over the roles others place you in. But you have all the power when it comes to the story you’re telling yourself and the one you’re living.
You are not just a character in someone else’s narrative. You are the author of your own beautiful, messy, perfectly imperfect story.
Want to dive deeper into this journey of self-discovery and authentic living? I’ve created something special just for you. It’s a guide called “Embracing Your Authentic Self: 5 Soul-Stirring Exercises to Reclaim Your Story.”
It’s yours, free, because I believe in you and the incredible journey you’re on.
DOWNLOAD Your FREE Guide ⬅️
You’ve got this. Let’s write your story together, one authentic page at a time.
Remember, it’s not about fitting into their stories – it’s about living (and belonging) truthfully in your own.
Chat soon!🫶🏻
Tonya
→3 Ways to Elevate Your Life (For Real)
→Become the next-level version of who you’re meant to be. Ditch the Perfectionism Paralysis It’s time to embrace ‘good enough’ and actually enjoy your success. Email me: hello@tonyakay.co
→Master the Art of Purposeful Productivity. Because being busy isn’t the same as being fulfilled, my friend. EmbraceImpact over Hustle. Grab A Guide to Show You How or Book a Call.
→Lead with Authenticity (No Power Suit Required) Discover your unique leadership style and watch your influence soar. → Book a “True North Strategy” session (Let’s map out your path to purposeful impact)