That’s Just the Way it is.

Hey there, have you ever heard this…

You’re just going to have to SUCK IT UP!!

Wait, WHAT?

Yikes, gut punch!! Hearing those words hit me hard; I cried (and screamed) the entire drive home.

Yet, it’s exactly what I needed to hear because it sparked something deep inside; a fire was ignited, and there was no shutting it down.

I realized, in that very moment, that I’ve spent my life doing exactly that—sucking it up, people-pleasing, and putting everyone else’s needs before my own.

And, to be honest, I had had enough. I mean ENOUGH!

Have you been there?

That moment when everything changed? You know the one.

It took me a long time to realize that life didn’t have to be this way.

It’s been well over a decade, maybe even close to two, that I’ve been on this journey of self-discovery, looking for answers, trying to ‘find myself’ and uncover the ‘real me.’ I devoured books, podcasts, and webinars and sat through countless hours of therapy and counseling.

I’d been here the entire time, just under the surface, hiding in plain sight, right behind generational beliefs and ways of thinking that didn’t align any longer. And, maybe they never did.

Will the real Tonya Kay please step forward…

I’ve learned that without setting boundaries and really digging deep to understand who you are, without everyone else’s expectations and limitations, you never reach your full potential.

I started by breaking down my own limiting beliefs and digging deep to find my core values.

My core values are: Love, Connection, and Gratitude.

I filter everything through those three core values. If I feel off, I go back to see if I really am living through that lens; most often, I find that I’ve swayed a little too far left (or right.)

I learned how to get really honest with myself, to let go of needing outside validation, and to embrace my imperfections.

4 things that stood out along the path:

1. Break Down Limiting Beliefs: Start by recognizing and letting go of those beliefs that hold you back. Identify what truly matters to you and align your actions with those core values.
2. Embrace Your True Self: I’ve learned to be honest with myself and to stop seeking external validation. Let go of perfectionism (easier said than done) and embrace your authentic self because your uniqueness is your strength.
3. Silence the Noise: The cycle of busyness can feel like running on a hamster wheel. Take time to get quiet and listen to your inner voice. Your deepest truths are often found in stillness.
4. Acknowledge Your Worth: You don’t have to force yourself down paths that don’t align with who you are. You have unique gifts that the world needs. It’s time to acknowledge and embrace them.

This journey hasn’t been easy, and it’s been a long road for me. But it’s also been incredibly rewarding. I’m so grateful to those who have supported and believed in me along the way.

As you read this, I encourage you to reflect on your own journey.

• What are your core values?
• What beliefs do you need to let go of?
• How can you honor your true self every day?

You are worthy of living a life that reflects your deepest dreams and desires.

xoxo

Tonya Kay

▼bonus section▼

Based on your requests and feedback, I’ve spent the last couple of weeks designing and curating a few simple & easy-to-follow guides.

A gift to you and my way of saying Thank You for being a blessing in my life.

My goal is to help you ‘level up’ your life so you can live your BEST LIFE.

Hugs – T

How to Rest & Recover so You Can Avoid Burnout Learn how to incorporate the 7-types of rest into your life so you can be more productive and present without adding any more stress and avoid burnout. Less Stress, Please!

Crush your Goals in 6 Simple Steps When we set BIG goals, there’s the way we “think” it should be and how it “actually” is. Setting yourself up for success is the first step. Find out how so you can GET THOSE GOALS! I’ll take one of these!